A birthday greeting or an explanation? More like clues to help solve a puzzle. Which I could not even decipher what the code is. Ugh! I’m back again, old friend. Thought I already graduated from pouring out my thoughts to you. Yet here I am once again.
I have the need to organize my mind now, since today was a particularly crappy day. How ungrateful I may sound like. But honestly, I just wanted to decompress because I can feel that the steam is reaching the top of the kettle. Okay, going back.
I have always been honest with my two cents about a certain topic, most especially when it involves emotions and feelings about someone. And that is why I write again.
This letter (birthday greeting) was given to a particular someone from the past that is SLOWLY making his way into the present and into the future.
I used to have felt something out of the ordinary for him, but not like the outrageous feelings of a person infatuated.
I’d like to think that I am older and wiser now, so that I drink in sips with whatever the current situation with him is being offered. I also tend to reign in whatever stray feelings of kilig(?) I may feel for fear of being disappointed just because I assumed and thought about the words (written, said, sent thru sms) that came from him.
I guess I need a more substantial move, a direct one that clearly says, Hey, “I’d like to know you more in a personal way, the same it was for those looking for love.” Yep, melodramatic, and a typical girl ranting, I must say. But if you’d look back, what’s wrong with directly saying your intentions? Isn’t it more of a romance on both parties’ side if all intentions are clear? Hehe. So here goes the over-analyzing.
Stop sending mixed signals. You say you care, then drop off the face of the earth for quite a while. I begin to get used to the attitude, and I decided that it’s wise if I don’t expect anything from him YET, until such time he gives a more solid gesture? Intention? Plan?
As for me, I’ll let it be. As for the letter, It’s so vague that I’ll let the Lord’s plan occur, after all, it is He who knows about everything.
I’m just here in my little slice of earth, philisophizing (I guess) and randomly spewing thoughts.
Until my next post, old friend.