Supposed to be unpublished

I don’t care much for money.
Hindi ko alam kung magiging selfish ako.
Puro ako na lang ang iisipin ko
Kasiyahan ko, enjoyment ko, self fulfillment ko, journey ko
Konting konti na lang malapit na akong sumuko
Just say fuck it all.
Wala na akong pake kasi wala din naman kayong pake sa akin.
Tingin nyo ba gusto ko tong ginagawa ko? I never said I liked this. Yes I was willing to do it. In the guise of a daughter doing a responsibility and as a way of saying thank you to the father
But hell! Ang hirap! Pwede bang maging makasarili? Pwede bang sarili ko muna asikasuhin ko???
Pwede bang yung gusto ko, yung talents ko, yung ability ko ang iexplore ko?? Masyado ba yung masama at hindi ko magawa? Masyado na ba akong nakukulong sa expectations nila???
Gusto ko lang naman dati ko pa sinasabi, simpleng buhay. Damn ang hirap abutin eh. Hindi pala ganun kasimple ang simple.
Gustong gusto ko na lang umalis minsan. saan ang punta? Malay! Sa malayong malayong malayo. Yung makakapag isip ako ano ba talaga ang gusto kong gawin  sa buhay. Feeling ko malapit na akong magbreakdown sa depression. Sa sobrang gusto ko, gusto ko nang magkasakit just to see what would happen. oh di ba ang pathetic? At ang masakit pa, nobody sees and understands, well nobody human. All they see is the gruff exterior which they are so afraid to break down. Minsan nga kahit luha ayaw ng tumulo kahit pinipilit ko na minsan.

About The Scribbler

I have this thirst for learning. I am forever curious. I love to delve into stories by reading, watching or even listening. I believe I am unique. God is with Me all the time. I make mistakes but I learn from them. I love building lasting relationships. I am afraid of the unknown, so it's either I stay away or find out. I believe I am more matured that I was before.
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