Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13: 4 -7
I wanted to publish this post not to record the hurt, nor to serve as the ‘evidence’ portion of what happened to me lately, but rather, I wanted to share, at least to myself, what has been said between the two of us so that whenever I visit here, I may be reminded that if the Lord has been so good to forgive, then who am I, not to? This also meant that if what I really felt back then was the big L word, then I must be willing to let the good Lord work on our way, guide us in this journey called life, and still hone us and shape us better to become prepared to become His disciples.
I sincerely hope that whoever might read this apart from me, will not judge harshly, nor comment incriminating stuff. but rather, be inspired with what’s common between us: the desire to be changed by God and be a more able Disciple of Christ.
That was a truly lengthy post and it took me some time to make a coherent thought. HAHA
Oh diba he even managed to make a joke (which is totally not funny, though) and the only reason why I did not reply because of an almost empty batt. AND I was assigned photographer of my sister in her graduation. (Hooray for multi-tasking!)
I want to live by the saying LET BYGONES be BYGONES. and indeed, I felt considerable peace, because I know that this chapter in my life ends now. The hurt stopped, the anxiety stopped, the questions stopped.
I would like to stress the importance of the last part. This has indeed among my earnest and fervent prayers, to release me from the bondage of hurt and anxiety over what happened. That I wanted to serve the LORD wholeheartedly, and I cannot do that if I still am harboring hurt because of what he did (or more appropriately, did not} do. So here I am, I asked and asked from the Lord the possibility of talking to him just to clear the air, but only if it is His will. I was blessed enough to be given this opportunity, albeit being through chat only, which I think is our story. We are quite these pair of millennials, who incorporate technology with relating with one another. So, there, I cannot simply believe because it was in my prayers. Then here it is, he’s finally opening up what on earth happened. I may or may have understood it at the time, had he said it earlier, but then I think it is still included in God’s plan to teach me that I should not take matters into my own hands but trust in HIS plans for me. TOTAL SURRENDER, that’s what HE wants in me. TO TRUST HIM completely, TO WAIT, not only for the right time, but also WAIT ON HIM, FOR HE ALONE KNOWS WHAT’S BEST FOR US.
I remember the question our Pastor mentioned in the prayer meetings, it goes like this, “If we have free will, why do we follow the WILL of the LORD?” A genuinely good question to ask, and it also has a genuinely satisfying answer. It is because, following His will, is the sign of our faith in HIM. When we follow, it means we trust Him, we offer our lives to Him, and we have peace in our hearts with whatever we are experiencing, because we trust that He knows that it is part of our spiritual growth, to become more like Him.
At the end of the day, Love really does not keep a record of wrongs, but it does keep and exalt those who thank for answered prayers.
To God be always the glory!